As you already know, Morgan started off the year sleeping in his own room. And he is still enjoying that. He does the perfect twist of his body so that he can turn his turtle light on with his foot.
We went to San Diego to visit Grandma Sandra the weekend of the 12th. She had just learned that the bile duct cancer had spread to her liver, and her first round of chemo was scheduled for 17th. She was a little down given the news about her health, and you could tell that she wasn’t feeling as well as she did at Christmas, but otherwise she seemed strong and determined to fight this. Both days she showered and dressed herself, she had a hearty meal Saturday, prepared by Mike & Dia ‘“ her favorites: fried chicken wings, corn on the cob, mashed potatoes, corn bread and her mother’s coconut pound cake. She ate more at that meal than she did all weekend, probably in weeks.
Late Saturday afternoon she decided that Morgan needed a high chair, so off we went to The Baby Exchange, she waited in the car with Morgan while we looked to see if they had one we liked. They did, so she came in and paid for the chair, and then we headed back home for our fried chicken feast.
Sunday she was up early, but tired all day, sleeping off and on through out the day. But she still had a nice visit with Morgan.
We said our goodbye’s Sunday with plans to come back on Saturday for Mike & Dia’s Charger playoff party.
Morgan’s first tooth broke through his gums on Thursday, January 17th.
Sandra’s first round of chemo, also on Thursday, the 17th, went well, but she had thrush in her mouth and eating was impossible.
Friday was a stressful day at work for me. After months of trying to reclaim my job from the girl who filled in while I was on maternity leave, I was beginning to feel replaced, enough so that I started to consider leaving OFG. Before I made that decision I asked for a meeting with my boss, which was scheduled for Friday. As the meeting approached, my heart began to race, I was understandably nervous. I prepared for the meeting by creating a list of my features and benefits (after all I was meeting with a sales person, so I wanted to talk to him on his level). He read the list and asked ‘œSo you want more to do?’ I Said, ‘œYes, and I’™m feeling replaced.’ He said ‘œAbsolutely Not!’ so needless to say the meeting went well. I was able to talk about my desire to add value to the company, to help generate revenue, to advance into an office manager position, and to continue to do the bulk of what I used to do. I left the meeting with a commitment from him to move forward with returning some duties back to me and adding new ones. But my heart was still racing. And it continued to do so, even at 11pm when I laid down to go to sleep. I tried to calm it with deep breathing and it worked to a degree, as I fell asleep and slept through the night.
Saturday Don woke me at 8 am, and a quick check revealed that my heart was still racing. So, since we were planning on heading to San Diego that morning, I left Don to pack for himself and Morgan while I went to urgent care. After an EKG which showed that my resting heart rate was 180 beats per minute and erratic (should be 80 ‘“ 100 bpm) the Urgent Care Dr called an ambulance. And I called Don and Morgan to meet me at the hospital. They administered a couple of rounds of drugs, which did not work, they threatened to sedate me and shock my heart back into a normal sinus rhythm, but instead put me on a amiodoral drip, and I was finally moved to a bed in the step down ICU at 11 pm. Upon my arrival to the ward, my heart returned to Sinus rhythm. But I still needed to be monitored to ensure I stayed in sinus rhythm and that I did not develop a blood clot.
While all this was going on we were exchanging phone calls with Don’s family, he updating them on my condition, them updating us and Sandra’s condition. She had woken up Saturday unable to move from the neck to the shoulder and in excruciating pain. So Mike, Dia, Jeff & Laurie were working with Sandra, trying to get her pain under control and trying to get her to agree to go to the hospital, which she finally did on Sunday.
I was discharged late Sunday, and we called down to San Diego to see if we should come to their aid and to determine how serious Sandra’s condition was. We were told to wait until after the were able to meet with the Dr on Monday. Tests were done Monday and Tuesday and estimates of she has a week were reduced to she has one or two days. So Tuesday night we headed to San Diego.
But first, when I picked up Morgan from daycare he was very warm, they don’t have a thermometer, so I wasn’t sure how warm, but since we were leaving town until at least Sunday, I wanted him to be seen by his Dr. So we went straight from daycare to urgent care. His fever was 102.8. We administered Tylenol, and a cold compress, and his fever started to reduce. Meanwhile he was examined and the Dr found no signs of infection, no sniffles, no cough, no ear infection. So we quickly went home, and loaded up the car to head to San Diego. We dropped the dogs at Sandra’s and went straight to the hospital, arriving about 10 pm. We visited for awhile, and were shocked at how much she had declined from the previous weekend. Mike, Dia, Jeff & Laurie ‘“ bless them all, were understandably exhausted both physically and emotionally. It is my greatest regret that my health problems prevented us from being there over the weekend so that we could help with Sandra’s care. This was not an easy time for the 4 of them.
Morgan’s fever increased even with the Tylenol, so he got a cool bath when we got back to Sandra’s house, and cold compresses. His fever continued to rage through Thursday going as high as 103.2, I had him on a constant dosing of Tylenol, every 4 hours, and gave cool baths or cold compresses in between Tylenol doses when his fever was too high to let go. Friday he was finally fever free.
In the meantime, Sandra passed on Wednesday at about 6 pm. Earlier in the day I sat by her side with Morgan on my lap and he reached out and held her hand. He held it for about 10 ‘“ 15 minutes, and just sat silently with her, much like he did the past weekend, when she was feeling ok, but nowhere near 100%.
We each said our own goodbyes to Sandra. I promised her that Morgan would know who she was, and I fully intend to keep that promise. She was an amazingly tough and strong woman. She was sometimes challenging, but I loved and respected her for her fierce independence, her loyalty and her sheer will, not to mention her fierce protection of the ones she loved. Morgan will miss out on what a wonderful grandmother she was, and that makes me sad. I hope in some small way I can convey to him who she was, and that I can take a lesson from her strengths and be the kind of mother to Morgan that she was to Don and his brothers. In a lot of ways she is like my grandmother, so I know these traits are in my blood, I just have to have the courage to portray them.
The rest of the week in San Diego was spent making notifications, and arranging her memorial service, or as we like to call it ‘œThe Celebration of Her Life’. Services were held on Monday, to a standing room only crowd of 150 friends and family, dating all the way back to her high school days. Don and his brothers each gave a eulogy and the chaplain for Grossmont Hospice officiated the services. The eulogies from her sons would have made her so proud and also would have made her laugh so heartily, they did an amazing job of celebrating her life.
After a short family get together after the service, Don and I headed home. By this time Morgan had developed a stuffy nose and a cough (his first cough). So Tuesday morning I took him to the Dr, before my appointment at the Coumadin clinic. He was not running a fever, but was congested and a little wheezy, so we gave him a breathing treatment and left with a prescription for an inhaler of the same medicine. He stayed home on Tuesday with Dad, and then went back to daycare on Wednesday. He has been so stuffy and coughing so much that he lost his voice on Tuesday, and he has this sad raspy cry.
He is still stuffy, coughing and raspy, but no fever since 2:30 am on Tuesday. Today his coughs and sneezes have been very productive
Monday he had his 9 month check up and his monthly antibody shot.